Whatever I am trying to accomplish in the future must come along with my parents' blessings so that I am forever under their consent, support and bless..
Or so I thought.
I was in a sweet perfect vacation last few days. I accompanied my mum to a convention in Port Dickson. The gentle breeze of the ocean, the calming effect of the melodious waves, the perfect sunset-watching indulgence; I haven't had my private time i.e. doing nothing, for quite a long time.
As how I thought I would finally had my peace of mind, with a notebook in my hand, a pen in the other, the serene ocean view had helped me out with lots of plans and projections.
Not until I overheard my mum's talking with her other friends..
'I didn't want her to go to KL'
'Baru je ada tempat nak bermanja kat rumah'
'Baru je duduk rumah 2 bulan'
'Mana ada teman dekat rumah dah'
Erk!
I thought what she had wanted was the other way around.
There I go.
Another rigmarole nightmare happened in the naked daylight time.
Put myself back into another tangle of confusions.
I didn't put the blame on my mum.
Any mother would love to have their children around.
Especially when the children had been away from home for so long.
I didn't know what to say.
I stared at the ocean, secretly wished that some solutions might pop up from waves or written somewhere on the sand.
I do wished I can please myself and all at the same time, I can be able to take a very good care over my mum's feelings.
Which is quite impossible in my condition.
Probably going back to KL is not a very good idea after all.
A daughter has to put her mum's needs first, under whatever circumstances she is in.
I'll only exacerbate the whole situation if I stick to my plan.
Without a mum's bless, any human can't achieve greatly in life.
I love you, mak.
I think I'll stay.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
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2 comments:
erlow lil cuhsin..
1st of all..i've made da cake..
da recipe u gave me long ago..banana choc chip cake..it turns out good i guess..hee..everyone loves it!gheee~
n 2ndly...wut happen dear??
suddenly u've chnged ur mind..wut happen to all da long discussion we had dat day..??
i hope u'll have a deeper thoughts for this matter cus its 4 ur own future hun..
as for ur mum,she'll sure understands ,jus dat at the very beginning she'll be a bit sad mayb..all emak is like dat of cos..hee
but once u've proved to her dat how well u'll become later, then she'd realize dat lettin u go is da rite choice..
jus b brave kay hun..
sia2 u blaja tinggi2 but u cant develop ur talent..cewahh!..
hee..
so dear..UN-TANGLE up plisss!!!
oho ling...
so very nice of u.. still keeping up with my humble blog..
well..
i know
i know
our discussion had been long..
but my twisted mind and ever-sensitive feelings trapped me yet again..
i can't promise anything just yet..
but trust me, chances are,whatever fates hold and push us to and fro,they are destined to bring good for everyone.
if u are in my shoes, u wouldn't know what to do next either..
i am glad that u had successfully baked that second cake!
guess training is not that really necessary anymore eh?
i have plans, but i surely have to postpone some dear :(
yet, your support had deeply touched my heart :)
love
love
love always :)
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